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In honor of
Halloween we are devoting this issue of BabySteps to understanding and
helping young children cope with fears, which will hopefully help make
your child’s Halloween more sweet than scary.
Fears are
very normal and a natural part of your child’s development. Between
ages 2 and 3 years, children’s imaginations are blossoming, but the line
between fantasy and reality is still quite blurry. A shadow in the
window might be the ghost from the Halloween story you read yesterday.
The big green dinosaur from the birthday party may be hiding in the
closet. What makes the toddler years so sweet is that very young
children still believe in magic—but this ability to accept the
unbelievable also means that, in their world, monsters can be real too.
Read below
about a range of typical fears children experience in the early years.
Fear of Masks and Costumes
Seeing someone in costume can be very frightening for toddlers
because they are not yet able to grasp that a person is still the same
on the inside when their appearance changes. Read
here about ways to help your child
trick-or-treat without stress.
Fear of the Dark
Fear of the dark is very common in young children (and even some
older children and adults!). Read
here about ways to help your little one feel safe at bedtime.
Fear of the Doctor
It is very common
for young children to find the doctor scary, especially older toddlers
who are developing increasing body awareness and are focused on the
fact that their body belongs only to them. Plus, their developing
long-term memory means that they now can connect the doctor with past
memories of uncomfortable procedures, like shots or throat swabs for
strep. Read
here about ways to help your child manage fears around doctor’s
appointments.
Fear of the Vacuum or Other Loud Machines
What children find
scary varies based on their temperament and on the way they take in
information through their senses. That’s why some children may love
watching a fire truck whiz by. All the lights, noise, and movement are
exciting to them. But other toddlers may turn away, cover their ears,
and cry. All that stimulation is too much for them. Read
here about a toddler’s fear of the vacuum and how you can help
children cope with sensory experiences they find distressing.
The Power of Parents
Watch this brief
video clip to see how one mother uses her sensitivity, patience, and
support to help her daughter conquer a fear of the jack-in-the-box. As
you watch, think about ways you can help your own child overcome her
fears and begin to better understand the difference between fantasy and
reality.
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Fun
for the Under 3 Set
Here are
some fun playtime ideas just right for our favorite young people.
Birth to 12
Months:
Fun With Leaves—Collect some colorful fall
leaves from outside and let your baby look at and touch them (watch
closely—she may try to put them in her mouth). Talk about the colors
and the sounds they make when she crinkles them in her hands. Go
outside and try throwing handfuls of leaves and see if your baby would
like to copy you! Maybe she would enjoy crawling through a pile of
leaves...
12 to 24
Months:
Go On a Leaf Hunt—Take a walk with your toddler
and let him choose to bring home some of his favorite leaves and other
“treasures”—acorns, pebbles, etc. When you return home, give your child
a shoebox to keep his treasures in and talk about each one as you put
it in the box: The acorn is brown and bumpy. The pebble can roll so
quickly! The leaf is bright red; it is a maple tree’s leaf. Talking
together helps your child learn new words for the objects he sees in
the world around him.
24 to 36 Months:
Leaf Sorting—Collect 20 or
more fall leaves from outside (or better yet, do this activity outside
with your child). Ask your toddler to sort the leaves—perhaps by color
(red, orange, yellow, brown, or green), shape (round or pointy), or
size (big leaves or little leaves). Sorting activities help your
toddler develop problem-solving skills.
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